Clayton and I have signed a year lease for a quaint-ish little brick building about 6 blocks from Greenlake.  These apartments were built in 1910 and served as hunting lodges back when Ravenna Blvd. was Ravenna River.  The particular unit we’ve claimed appears to be a converted three-car garage, which is kinda cool because it means that our building, while still obviously a part of the complex, is set off by itself.  Meaning we have what could be called a cottage under the freeway, all to ourselves!  There is a small little area near our front door which I intent to cultivate into a functioning garden [or worm farm, if Rob Tupper has his way] come springtime.  I say front door, because we have two doors.  That’s right.  A front AND back door.  We’re also about 3 blocks from a fruit stand that our soon-to-be neighbor works at where we will have access to fresh produce.  I should also mention that our “back yard” is a park-and-ride where pretty much every bus that runs in Seattle passes through, which will be a sheer delight for Mr. Claytone as he can catch the bus to Everett right there, shaving about an hour off of his commute to school.   Perks!

For me, the move is serving as a catalyst for what I hope will be a chance to reset. realign. refresh my little life.  With the relocation to a little bit more lively neighborhood, I’m intending to become a little bit more lively again, myself.  I have already made an uncompromising list of changes that will take place in my realm.  Things I am in charge of, things that affect my day-to-day, and ultimately, my happiness and vitality.  Things like, oh I don’t know, paying bills on time.  Re-tapping into my creativity.  Visiting the dog park on a semi-regular basis. Reading books.  Simple things.  But, things that I’ve sort of let fall by the wayside that have compromised my ability to function effectively and happily.  I’m due for a raise at the old Value Village as well, which can help set some of this stuff into motion.  Primarily the bill paying.  I’ve also made a few moves to start “moving up the corporate ladder” to bulk up my resume and pocketbook during these economic hard times.  Which may eventually allow for me to (god forbid) start going out in this beautiful Emerald City and show interest in things I genuinely care about: art, theatre, people, nature, beer, etc.  Clayton and I are tossing around the idea of joining the Seattle Astronomical society which meets something like twice a month at our very own Greenlake since Clayton is now the proud owner of a telescope (another Value Village gem) through which we’ve viewed the moon on a few occasions.  We’ve also agreed to start camping on a semi-regular basis.  I don’t know what that looks like during the winter months, but I’m confident Clayton won’t lead me to my grave.  … It’s exciting.  It’s not much, but the possibilities seem endless, to me.  I feel like I’m a different person than I was two years ago.  You know, before I got fired and unemployed, and fucking depressed.

These past few months have been slow and steady, a gradual crawl out from under my rock and hopefully will continue to be prosperous.  I’m so happy for all of my friends; unspeakably happy for what everyone has accomplished, genuinely giddy that the ball just seems to be starting to roll for some very very exciting futures, pleased as punch to see Alaska friends again, so so so proud to just know the motherfuckers who are making new art everyday in Spokane, and well-wishing for those abroad, waiting for fantastic stories, and am just JAZZED on the possibilities Autumn holds for everyone.  I love you all so much, and am proud to know you.

That being said, Clayton and I are planning a housewarming party for sometime in the beginning of October and would like it to be a time and date that works well for as many people as possible.  So, my guess is if you’ve read this far, you’re my friend and I want you to be there.  [I'm looking at you, Spokane. Alaska...]  When works?

Seattle couldn’t be prettier as of the the last few days. The gloominess of June seems to be far behind us, and everything around here is just brimming with life. Our porch plants are exceeding their bounds; the trees outside are taller and greener than ever; the air smells and feels like a warm ocean hug; Seattle flesh abounds in all sizes and colors this year….lots of spandex, lots of bicycles, lots of grunge. Its beautiful. Unfortunately, while the rest of the Northwest was kicking-off summer so to speak on our fine country’s day of Independence, Clayton and I were home sick as dogs. No, sicker. We’ve since recovered and actually got a chance to get to the beach the other day…along with everyone else in the city, including Daddy and Shnee (!!) and Clayton took some lovely sunset pictures. Which I’ll show you.

Not to shabby, eh? That Claytone. Oh, and speaking of Claytone we’ve decided on a band direction and have both quit smoking. So, keep your ears peeled for some heavenly harmonies coming from lower Magnolia…We’ve been inspired buy the greats of our record collection. Think folk circa Peter, Paul and Mary. But, with out Peter. Or Paul. Folk majik. Or Simon and Garfunkel, if Garfunkel were a girl. Which he pretty much sounds like already. In any case. It’ll be awesome.

In other news, we’ve taken the baby gates down. One miraculous afternoon after Clayton replaced one baby gate with a piece of pressboard, Spanky wandered into the living room and didn’t really leave. We’ve since been walking the boys together….a slow and steady healing process (hopefully). Bob still avoids huge chunks of the apartment that Spanky is occupying if he has the choice. But, he’ll sort of stalk around and then lie down. A nice compromise, in my opinion. I’ll leave you with this thought, sock monkeys go for around 30 bones on eBay.

After about a year and half of thinking about it, I did it. I made the bacon-baskets. And, let me tell you. They were damn good.  And easy. And cheap.  AND puuurrrfffeecccct if you have surprise company (and buy eggs by the five dozen).  Not to mention, on this particular day, I tried cooking bacon twice on the stove and burnt it twice.  I’m not talking “just didn’t slow roast, let it get too crispy to fast” kind of burning.  I’m talking about “went outside and completely forgot about the bacon and the house is filling with smoke” kind of burning. TWICE.  So, I was feeling a little discouraged, and still hungry.  Naturally, I figured if I throw my ingredients in the oven, it will be the oven’s fault if it burns again.  I guess that’s some kind of logic. So there you have it.  I made only three bacon-baskets, because I was home alone, but you can make as many as you’d like.

Here’s what you need:

• 1 piece of bread (per basket)
• 1 piece of bacon (per basket)
• 1 egg (per basket)
• maybe some salt and pepper to taste
• and, VALENTINA.

Oh, and cheese. Duh.

Preheat that oven to 400 degrees, and get to crafting.

I recommend starting the bacon before anything, because if you’re slow roasting it (which you should be) it takes about five minutes longer.  I took a nice big picture so you could see what setting my burner is on. Three: my personal fave. And, don’t forget, it’ll be cooking longer in the oven too so don’t try and crisp it up right meow on the burner.

I take a picture for this step, because its always something I forget to do.  Grease. The. Muffin. Pan. Butter, spray, oil, shortening, I don’t care what you use, but it’ll be one helluva mess if those eggs get stuck to the pan. Trust. Me.

If you have a sweet tool that can cut a hole in your bread that is more high-tech than mine, fine. But, I think the glass is the best thing since…well. sliced bread, I guess. Also, if you put the hole in the middle you can use the bread later for smushmortions-in-a-hole.  Which I love.

But, didn’t think about until I was on my last piece of bread. Damn.

Does this step surprise you?

Next, grate some cheese (sharp cheddah is what we have here) and sprinkle some on your uncooked bread circles. Also, by now your bacon should be close to being done, so remove it from the heat, pat it off, and put it in your basket.

You should have something that looks a little bit like that.  My bacon pieces don’t quite go ’round because I had center-cut that week.  Which are teeny-weeny bacons. But, also. Really really really good.  So, put this in the oven for about five minutes so the bacon can crisp up a little more, and the toast can become toasty.

This is important.  If you want these to be perfect, this MUST BE THE HOT-SAUCE you use.  I bet you can guess, the eggs and spicy-spice go in next.  Now, for the sake of my boyfriend’s sensitive palette (and for my own practice) I have cracked one of the yolks and mixed up the egg/cheese/spicy-spice to see the difference in cooking time. The one with the cracked egg could have stood to be in about two minutes longer for the sake of a completely non-runny yolk.

I recommend not using a large portion of the egg white, because mine seemed like they would flood the cupcake holes if I did. And, they were way tasty without all that goo anyway. A little salt and pepper and those babies are ready to go back in the oven.  And, just in time for me to want to smoke a cigarette.

After about 8 or so minutes, the white should be set and the yolk creamy (or…you should have a teeny scramble after about 10).

And, basically, there you have it.  Be mindful when taking these guys out, you don’t want to get egg errywhere.

Ta-Da! Enjoy! (there’s only like 3 dishes to do later!)

perfect for the morning munchies

You will Need:
1 3/4 c. all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. ground nutmeg
1/4 tsp. ground cinnamon
3/4 c. sugar
1/3 c. vegetable oil
3/4 c. rice milk
1 egg, lightly beaten
and, of course, jelly.

topping:
cinnamon/sugar combo
melted margarine.

I like to begin by gathering my ingredients. Just in case I get halfway through and realize I don’t have salt, or something.

First: whisk your flour, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and nutmeg in a large bowl.

In another (slightly smaller) bowl combine your egg, sugar, oil and rice milk.

stir wet ingredients into dry ingredients until moistened.

Now, make sure your baking pan is plenty greased up, we don’t want these babies to get stuck.
Fill each cupcake hole about halfway full, then add a teaspoon of jam. Bury the jam leaving the cupcake tins about 3/4 full.

I like to watch mine bake. About 20 minutes at 325.

Also, in the meantime, melt your margarine and make a little cinnamon/sugar collage. Also, if you’re “that” kind of cook, I use this time to do the dishes as well…Nothing like fresh baked goods in a nice clean kitchen, am I right?

Immediately after removing the muffins from the oven (carefully) dip the tops in your margarine, then cinnamon sugar mixture.

serve warm, or at room temperature.

Then take a nap if you want. Dishes are done, after all.

In other news, I started reading Ishmael. I intend on finishing here in about 3 hours.  Oh, and for those among us who have been trying to get our grubby paws on a copy to read? Google books that shit.

Its at Discovery Park.

And, I have no idea how to edit. so…this is straight from me and my camera.

I…find that a weeeeeee bit impressive. But, then. I’m not a photographer.

Approx. 4 c. macaroni

Approx. 2 1/2 c. milk [or 1/2 and 1/2 if your feeling particularly ballsy]

1/2 stick of butter

4 tablespoons of flour

1 1/2 c. sharp cheddah

1 c. pepper jack

Approx. 1 c. breadcrumbs [grate a piece of bread over the cheese-grater. voila.]

salt/pepper/nutmeg to taste

Melted butter/garlic powder combo to taste

Cook your pasta according to the package directions, EXCEPT cook for one minute less than directed. Drain well.

As the pasta is draining, using the same pot, melt the butter, whisk in the flour and cook for 1 – 2 minutes stirring constantly. Pour in the milk, salt, pepper, and nutmeg, and stir until thickened. Stir in the cheese all at once and continue stirring until melted – about 50 – 60 seconds. Remove from heat. Stir in the pasta and pour into a buttered baking dish. Top with the bread crumbs, and drizzle with the melted butter. Bake in a preheated 400 degree oven for 20 minutes. While its cooling, my suggestion is to take pictures of it.  But, be sure you let it cool. Its 400 degrees. Serve.

Do everything way more slowly. Seriously, what do you have planned today? Why not make it worth while.  If your anything like me, you’re probably eating like one meal a day, right? Make. It. Last. I find that when I give enough time and energy to any particular task I have around here, its that much more rewarding.  Allow yourself to appreciate your life. I think there is a whole school of thought for what I’m trying to say. Oh yeah, Zen.  Which, according to wikipedia aims to discover the Buddha-nature within each of us through meditation and mindfulness of daily experiences…which ultimately lead to enlightenment.  sweet.

Change banks. If you haven’t yet. Lets face it, you’re probably getting fucked by Chase. Am I right? Get a credit union, like BECU.  It used to be just for Boeing employees, but now all you have to do  is either work or live in the state of Washington and you qualify.  And you can do it…get. this. Online. ANNNNDDDD the minimum deposit to open a checking account is something like, one dollar [you can find that on the street, come on]. Lemme help, https://www.becu.org/default.aspx?var=olb.

Go to Value Village. Man, the possibilities are virtually endless in this place. You can donate ANYTHING you have and don’t want anymore and they turn around and give you a discount to buy more stuff from them. Or, you can just go and explore…there are soooooo many sections. Or, you can transform your wardrobe for little to no dollars.  Or, you can get a bunch of new furniture.  Or, books.  Let me pause and discuss the books for a sec.  Here are a few recent titles I’ve picked up…just to interest/amuse you/me: “The Psychic Healing Book”, “When Good Dogs do Bad Things: proven solutions to 30 common problems”, “Ancient and Modern Witchcraft”, “The Woman’s Dictionary of Symbols and Sacred Objects”…you get the idea. And, my god, the games. Which, I might mention, are a good way to spend time as well.  They always have at least one Trivial Pursuit which is like a whole day’s activity that you learrrrn from.

Organize your closet. Its fun. You find stuff you forgot. Its a good excuse to go to Value Village.  It looks awesome. Do it.

Purge your iTunes. I just deleted MercyMe…it’d been a long time.

Take a bath. This is when I allow myself to smoke inside. Naughty, I know. I also have bath toys. And bubble bath.  And, like a bajillion loofahs.  Thanks Doob.

Cook something new new. You know, like nothing you have any idea how to make.  You can get a cookbook at Value Village, or, god forbid…explore a new part of the internet.  I made the most bitchin’ mac and cheese I’ve ever had last week. Twice. Because it was that delicious.

Do what you want. Face it, if you don’t master your own destiny no one will. Or worse, someone else will.

TROLL craigslist. You already should be, I mean, if you’re looking for a job.  But like Value Village, there are soooo many sections. I got a free haircut yesterday. FREE.  And the personals always make me feel a little better.

Go outside. Sure, its winter. But its the mildest winter I’ve seen in at least 5 years. Depressed-ass.

Find a show that has a LOT of seasons. Myself? Star Trek.  For those days when going outside is sickening.

Quit Smoking. Cigarettes. Its a filthy habit that costs to much money anyway.  Everybody’s doing it, and you’ll thank yourself (maybe) when you make it to fifty. Plus, it takes a surprising amount of will-power.  You wont be bored for a few days…eh?

Get musical. I choose the piano, because I have no idea how to use a guitar. I also recommend the kazoo.  Its a more apartment-friendly piece.  And, you know a good place to pick up new musical instruments? Value. Village. Or, craigslist.  Forever free pianos and organs.

Pay your bills. Because the world doesn’t stop turning, and you don’t want bad credit.

Create. Seriously.  Anything.  It makes you like insta-twenty times happier.  I have watercolors on hand.  And crayons.  And a glue gun.  And a 300-in-one chemistry set from, you guessed it. Value Village. I seriously can’t stress Value Village enough. They donate the money to BLIND KIDS for heaven’s sake.

Laundry. You know you have too.

Alright, my friends.  I love you.  Take heart, I’m still receiving a monthly newsletter from Private Islands, inc. Soon enough we’ll be able to buy an island.  And, when that day comes, we’ll be ready.

http://www.myspace.com/gaydatheband

pə-ˈrād, my friends. don’t hesitate to have a listen. I would argue they will soon be taking the analog world by STORM. So, there you are. You don’t want to miss out, right?

Pre-order your cassette, today!

http://thebattle.co.uk/lna/

misses, kisses, loves and hugs all around.